THE
FACTS OF LIFE
- Submitted
by M. Von Stein
Nobody
will ever win the battle of the sexes.
There's too
much fraternizing with the enemy.
There's
a fine line between fishing and
standing on
the shore like an idiot.
Did
you ever walk into a room and forget why you walked in?
I think that's
how dogs spend their lives.
Don't
worry about the world ending today...
It's already
tomorrow in Australia.
(unless you're
in Australia -then start worrying)
Outside
of a dog, a book is man's best friend.
Inside of
a dog, it's too dark to read.
Character
is what you are.
Reputation
is what people think you are.
Drive
carefully
It's not only
cars that can be recalled by their maker.
A
loser is a window washer on the 44th floor who
steps back
to admire his work..
A
man usually feels better after a few winks,
especially
if she winks back.
Friends
may come and go, but enemies accumulate.
The
facts, although interesting, are irrelevant.
There
is always one more imbecile than you counted on.
If
at first you don't succeed ... well, so much for sky diving.
A
man who says marriage is a 50-50 proposition doesn't understand
two things:
1 - Women, 2 - Fractions.
