CUT TO:
THIS KID
lying in bed, coughing. Pale, one sick cookie. Maybe he's seven or eight
or nine. He holds a remote in one hand, presses it, and
the video game moves a little bit. Then he's hit by another spasm of
coughing, puts the remote down.
His room is monochromatic, greys and blues, mildly high-tech. We're
in the present day and this is a middle class house,
somewhere in the suburbs.
CUT TO:
The Kid's MOTHER as she enters, goes to him, fluffs his pillows, kissses
him, and briefly feels his forehead. She's worried, it
doesn't show. During this
--
MOTHER
You feeling any better?
THE KID
A little bit.
MOTHER
Guess what.
THE KID
What?
MOTHER
Your grandfather's here.
THE KID
(not overjoyed)
Mom, can't you tell him that I'm sick?
MOTHER
You are sick, that's why he's here.
THE KID
He'll pinch my cheek. I hate that.
MOTHER
Maybe he won't.
The Kid shoots her an "I'm sure" look, as we
CUT TO:
THE KID'S GRANDFATHER bursting into the room. Kind of rumpled. But the
eyes are bright. He has a wrapped package
tucked under one arm as be immediately goes to The Kid, pinches his
cheek.
GRANDFATHER
Hey! How's the sickie? Heh?
The Kid gives his Mother an "I told you so" look. The Mother ignores it, beats a retreat.
MOTHER
I think I'll leave you two pals.
(And she is gone. There's an uncomfortable silence, then-)
GRANDFATHER
I brought you a special present.
THE KID
What is it?
GRANDFATHER
Open it up.
The Kid does. He does his best to smile.
THE KID
A book?
GRANDFATHER
That's right. When I was your age, television
was called books. And this is a special book. It was the book my
father used to read to me when I was sick,
and I used to read it to your father. And today, I'm gonna read it to
you.
THE KID
Has it got any sports in it?
CUT TO:
THE GRANDFATHER
Suddenly passionate.
GRANDFATHER
Are you kidding? Fencing. Fighting. Torture. Revenge. Giants. Monsters. Chases. Escapes. True love. Miracles.
CUT TO:
THE TWO OF THEM as the Grandfather sits in a chair by the bed.
THE KID
(manages a shrug)
It doesn't sound too bad. I'll try and stay awake.
GRANDFATHER
Oh. Well, thank you very much. It's very nice of you. Your vote of confidence is overwhelming. All right.
(Book open now, be begins to read.)
The Princess Bride, by S. Morgenstern. Chapter
One. Buttercup was raised on a small farm in the country of
Florin.
DISSOLVE TO:
The story he's reading about, as the monochromatic look of the bedroom
is replaced by the dazzling color of the English
countryside.
GRANDFATHER
(off-screen)
Her favorite pastimes were riding her horse
and tormenting the farm boy that worked there. His name was
Westley, but she never called him that.
(to the kid)
Isn't that a wonderful beginning?
THE KID
(off-screen)
(doing his best)
Yeah. It's really good.
GRANDFATHER
(off-screen)
(reading)
Nothing gave Buttercup as much pleasure as ordering Westley around.
&nbs p; CUT TO:
BUTTERCUPS FARM - DAY
BUTTERCUP is standing, holding the reins of her horse, while in the
background, WESTLEY, in the stable doorway, looks at
her. Buttercup is in her late teens; doesn't care much about clothes
and she hates brushing her long hair, so she isn't as attractive
as she might be, but she's still probably the most beautiful woman
in the world.
BUTTERCUP
Farm boy. Polish my horse's saddle. I want to see my face shining in it by morning.
WESTLEY
(quietly, watching her)
As you wish.
Westley is perhaps half a dozen years older than Buttercup. And maybe
as handsome as she is beautiful. He gazes at her as she
walks away.
GRANDFATHER
(off-screen)
"As you wish" was all he ever said to her.
DISSOLVE TO:
WESTLEY, outside, chopping wood. Buttercup drops two large buckets near him.
BUTTERCUP
Farm Boy. Fill these with water --
(a beat)
--please.
WESTLEY
As you wish.
She leaves; his eyes stay on her. She stops, turns -- he manages to look away as now her eyes stay on him.
GRANDFATHER
(off-screen)
That day, she was amazed to discover that when he was saying, "As you wish," what he meant was, "I love you."
DISSOLVE TO:
BUTTERCUP IN THE KITCHEN - DUSK
Westley enters with an armload of firewood.
GRANDFATHER
(off-screen)
And even more amazing was the day she realized she truly loved him back.
BUTTERCUP
(pointing to a pitcher that she could reach herself)
Farm Boy, fetch me that pitcher.
He gets it, hands it to her; they are standing very close to each other gazing into each other's eyes.
WESTLEY
As you wish.
(Now he turns, moves outside.)
DISSOLVE TO:
WESTLEY AND BUTTERCUP, outside his tiny hovel in the red glow of sunset. They are locked in a passionate kiss.
THE KID
(off-screen)
-hold it, hold it-
CUT TO:
THE KID'S ROOM
THE KID
What is this? Are you trying to trick me? -- Where's the sports? -- Is this a kissing book?
GRANDFATHER
-- wait, just wait --
THE KID
-- well, when does it get good?
GRANDFATHER
Keep your shirt on. Let me read.
(reading again)
Westley had no money for marriage. So he packed
his few belongings and left the farm to seek his fortune across
the sea.
CUT TO:
WESTLEY AND BUTTERCUP
They stand near the gate to the farm, locked in an embrace.
GRANDFATHER
(off-screen)
(reading)
It was a very emotional time for Buttercup --
THE KID
(off-screen)
(groaning)
I don't be-leeve this.
BUTTERCUP
I fear I'll never see you again.
WESTLEY
Of course you will.
BUTTERCUP
But what if something happens to you?
WESTLEY
Hear this now: I will come for you.
BUTTERCUP
But how can you be sure?
WESTLEY
This is true love. You think this happens every day?
He smiles at her, she smiles too, throws her arms so tightly around
him. They kiss. Then as Westley walks away, Buttercup
watches him go.
GRANDFATHER
(off-screen)
(reading)
Westley didn't reach his destination. His ship
was attacked by the Dread Pirate Roberts, who never left captives
alive. When Buttercup got the news that Westley
was murdered --
;
THE KID
(off-screen)
(perking up a little)
-- murdered by pirates is good --
CUT TO:
CLOSE UP: Buttercup, staring out the window of her room.
GRANDFATHER
(off-screen)
She went into her room and shut the door. And for days, she neither slept nor ate.
BUTTERCUP
(no emotion at all in her voice)
I will never love again.
HOLD ON HER FACE, perfect and perfectly sad.